Day 13 #pathways2resilience ~ Secondary/Metastatic Awareness

Special Feature Edition: Pathways to Resilience: Embracing our Vulnerability, Celebrating our Resilience

Are You Ready to Start Talking About Secondary Breast Cancer?

Today, October 13th, is Secondary Breast Cancer Awareness Day, one solitary day out of a month-long Pinktober - it’s the not-so-pink lining which we women with primary breast cancer can hardly bear to face.

Here in the UK around 12,000 women die as a result of secondary breast cancer every year. These women are mothers, sisters, daughters, friends and partners.

Around 30% of women with primary breast cancer go on to develop secondary breast cancer - breast cancer which has spread to other parts of the body through the lymphatic or blood system. You might hear it described as ‘advanced breast cancer’, ‘metastatic’, or stage 4 breast cancer. You might also hear about so-and-so who had breast cancer and then developed liver cancer. This is inaccurate - breast cancer that has spread to the liver is not the same as liver cancer.

At the Research Centre for Building Psychological Resilience, we hear from our friends living with secondary breast cancer about how isolating and marginalised they feel in the breast cancer community and over the next few days, we'll be sharing some of their experiences highlighting the way in which they continue living rich and meaningful lives.

We desperately need to know why it is that some women find out that their cancer has returned, despite extensive treatment, despite having been told they were ‘all clear. If we can be brave, and stop hiding from our fears, we can start talking. If we can start talking, not only can we support one another, we can advocate, and we can press for better and more effective treatments.

We will not be featuring any one person today for our #pathways2resilience project, instead we wish to share a blog by our deputies, Tamsin and Vicky, published earlier this year on HuffPost UK. We dedicate this post to those who have died from secondary breast cancer and the thousands who continue to live with the worry and uncertainty of their condition every single day. #DontIgnoreStageIV

Please read the blog ‘We Need to Talk about Secondary Breast Cancer’ here: http://m.huffpost.com/uk/entry/10247000?utm_hp_ref=uk-women

You can also find further information and support below.

Secondary Breast Cancer Charities:  
http://www.secondhope.co.uk/

http://www.secondary1st.org.uk/

Breast Cancer Care:

#NotSecondRate campaign

https://www.breastcancercare.org.uk/secondary

#panningforgold #pathways2resilience

#bcresiliencecentre #breastcancerawareness

#SBCAD #DontIgnoreStageIV

Weekly Discussion Summary ~ How to Live with Cancer

Autumn has well and truly arrived and the longer evenings offer the chance for greater reflection. In this week's discussion, we explored 'how to live' with cancer and the effects of cancer.

Our discussion was inclusive of primary and secondary breast cancer, we are very aware of the different implications of each diagnosis, but also how important it is to learn about secondary breast cancer and consider it on a continuum to primary breast cancer.

We take our vulnerability forward, whether we are trying to move on after treatment for primary breast cancer, trying to come to terms with the limitations that face us as a result of our treatment, or when cancer returns and we are on continuous treatment. This was an opportunity to talk to one another about our concerns and the fears that affect us all, and to learn from one another.

#ResilienceDiscussion

Day 12 #pathways2resilience ~ Zara

Special Feature Edition: Pathways to Resilience: Embracing our Vulnerability, Celebrating our Resilience

My text book of cancer emotions...

They say that a picture speaks louder than a thousand words. For Zara, an artist and a member of our group, a picture conveys more than a thousand emotions, mixed, moving and intensifying. They speak quietly, yet are penetrative. Zara's art on conveying the many emotional roller coasters that breast cancer brings with it, is breathtaking. Her sketchbook, her companion while undergoing chemotherapy, sings. Take a look at how she's used her medical notes to convey the many mixed emotions of pain, fear, gratitude, love, and despair in one sketch: "I want to make something beautiful out of something ugly". Landscapes post treatment look ambiguous, showing the uncertainty that covers the seeds of our survivorship and our hopes.

For our month long project #pathways2resilience, we are delighted to introduce Zara's first blog for Panning for Gold, 'My sketchbook of breast cancer emotions'.

I was diagnosed with breast cancer in 2014 aged 51. Very quickly I had a mastectomy followed by chemotherapy. For a woman who has always been fairly neurotic and prone to anxiety and depression I took it well. I was "strong", "brave" and even funny- apart from when I wasn't but I kept my meltdowns private. I felt very grateful for having children old enough to have left home and not to have to witness the dark days. My husband was wonderful, I have great friends, countryside, lucky me!

'On being diagnosed with breast cancer' (May 2014) 130 x 150 cm

Actually, I hate the narrative of being strong and brave. Also I struggle with the endless requests for donations, the videos on social media whisking us through the 'journey' - Hospital, baldness, cats on the bed, followed by pink balloons, marathons and tears of joy! I get it, but for some reason it makes me angry. Perhaps because we struggle financially and I want to dedicate my time to other things rather than breast cancer. Then I feel guilty and mean, but that's my "stuff".

Before becoming a full time painter in 2009 I was a Social worker working with the most damaged children and families. In latter years I worked therapeutically with families affected by addiction. Using art to help others express themselves was an aspect of my work that I loved. It wasn't about being "good" at it, but an opportunity to work visually to explore and manage feelings. Art has always been a part of my life. Painting the landscape, being out there with myself, escaping from everything else and doing what I love to do, ticks all my boxes. I like painting portraits as well and drawing and sketching and doodling – doing anything that involves art.

I took my sketchbook to every chemo session. Horrified by the red liquid going into my veins I looked away and drew like a maniac, sometimes I would sketch the patients opposite me.

For some reason I kept all my medical notes. I remember thinking "I want to make something beautiful out of something ugly" My first collage wasn't beautiful at all. But I think I achieved that with 'Hot cheeks' and with some of my recent work. They are not so graphic now. Little pieces of Tamoxifen packets woven here and there, hidden in the landscape for the viewer to spot or not. I follow the Building resilience in breast cancer FB page but rarely comment. My respect and admiration for the women on there goes beyond words, it scares me too. So far I have been lucky. The "gift" for me has been a creative energy and on a good day, an ability to live in the moment.

Later I shall be at the hospital having a lump checked out on my remaining breast. "I'm sure it will be fine" I say to others and myself. But deep down I am terrified.

At the chapel (2) Charcoal & collage - 130 x 150 cm

www.zara-McQueen.co.uk

#panningforgold #pathways2resilience

#bcresiliencecentre #breastcancerawareness

Day 11 #pathways2resilience ~ Fran

Special Feature Edition: Pathways to Resilience: Embracing our Vulnerability, Celebrating our Resilience

Fran, another wonderful member of our centre, shares her resilience with us for our month long feature #pathways2resilience:

Hello my name is Fran,

I found my very big lump on the 21st of December 2014 and a smaller one too; it was a huge shock. I was diagnosed 9th January 2015 with grade 2 breast cancer and had a mastectomy 4th February with an implant reconstruction, but it didn't last so there was a second operation on the 20th March 2015. Then, 4 heavy doses of chemo which made me ill for a week each time, then radiotherapy which gave me a boost.....then back to work on the 21st August 2015 - 8 months later.

My youngest son asked 'Will you die?' I said no.....and I kept my promise....the thing that helped me personally was my positive attitude, my resilience, because I am grateful to everyone who looked after me. I am lucky as it could have been so much worse.....now I live life to the brim. I wake up every morning and I am happy as I am alive, yes my bones ache because of the medicine I have to take but it's okay....

Some things do not matter anymore, but my family, my boys, my partner and his children, my friends…that's what matters, telling them I love them matters...being positive is important to me. I look at things differently now. Life is good.

#panningforgold #pathways2resilience

#bcresiliencecentre #breastcancerawareness

Day 10 #pathways2resilience ~ Anita

Special Feature Edition: Pathways to Resilience: Embracing our Vulnerability, Celebrating our Resilience

Anita is a dedicated ambassador of our Centre. The insight she brings to our private group fills every one of our members with hope and serenity. With her knowledge of mindfulness meditation and counselling her comments and guidance on our pathway to resilience is much needed. She is interactive and brings much valuable advice in our everyday posts as well as our Sunday discussions. We love Anita and so do all of our private group members!

I had breast cancer and I'm making room for the activities I like doing.

I love being an ambassador for the Centre for Building Psychological Resilience in Breast Cancer. I stumbled across the private group after spotting a post seeking research participants, and I'm proud to have been part of its growth. I can speak my truth there and know I'll be acknowledged. I am also delighted to support others by commenting and sharing thoughts and ideas.

Around two and a half years ago I left my stressful corporate job with a view to completing a hypnotherapy and counselling course leading to a new career. I spent the summer having long lunches with friends. I took on some challenging voluntary work in a hospice in the spiritual care team, and everything was going swimmingly. Then following a routine mammogram came my breast cancer diagnosis, stopping me in my tracks and forcing me to spend a long winter travelling between my sofa and the hospital.

My second year cancerversary looms. These days I'm seeking a quieter life: long lazy days filled with dog walks, yoga, reading, baking, writing, making cards - lots of solitary pursuits that feed my soul. I've joined a choir, which makes my heart sing. I volunteer at a community cafe, supporting young people with disabilities and learning difficulties. I'm still studying, which gives me the goals and projects I thrive on. Oh yes, and I am still a lady who lunches frequently.

My wonderful partner Geoff, who has been my solid rock for nearly 30 years, works so hard to support me. I have a small pension from my old job, and if we can manage on what we have I'm not going to go back to work. My two amazing boys are out there in the world making their own way. It's my time now, and my goal is simply to live my life my way.

#panningforgold #pathways2resilience

#bcresiliencecentre #breastcancerawareness

Day 9 #pathways2resilience ~ Jackie

Special Feature Edition: Pathways to Resilience: Embracing our Vulnerability, Celebrating our Resilience

Jackie Buxton is a writer, editor and teacher of creative writing.
Jackie used her experience of an aggressive form of breast cancer to inform and dispel some myths about a cancer diagnosis via her popular blog: Agenthood and Submissionville. These posts became the frame-work of self-help memoire, Tea & Chemo (Urbane Publications, November 2015) which has a five star rating from over 75 reviews.

Jackie’s first novel, Glass Houses, has been recently published and is about two women's stupid mistakes, the ramifications and the silver linings. When not writing or reading, over-seeing house and teens, Jackie can be found running, cycling or tripping up though the beautiful Yorkshire countryside.

https://www.amazon.co.uk/Glas.../dp/1910692840/ref=sr_1_1... 

#panningforgold #pathways2resilience

#bcresiliencecentre #breastcancerawareness

Day 8 #pathways2resilience ~ Lynn

Special Feature Edition: Pathways to Resilience: Embracing our Vulnerability, Celebrating our Resilience

"I've learned to not to take life for granted..to follow my dreams...."

I was diagnosed with breast cancer and Paget's disease. I thought my world had come crashing down.

My first thought was how I'm I going to get my breasts out for all these strangers I'd never met before - doctors, nurses, wound nurses etc. Well let me tell you every person I met along the way treated me with nothing but dignity and care, how wrong my concerns were. I was very lucky as it was caught very early. I had to endure a mastectomy and then a reconstruction that failed. I'm now awaiting a further reconstruction.

It may sound strange to say I wouldn't change being diagnosed with cancer, honestly! I've learnt what matters and what doesn't, I've learnt how to step off the wheel of life when needed, I've learnt not to take life for granted, I've learnt to follow my dreams, who my real friends are. Lastly I've learnt to take control. Don't be frightened, don't be scared. If you have any worries or concerns please seek medical advice. I did and it's saved my life.

Lynn, another wonderful member of our centre, shares her resilience with us for our month long feature.

#pathways2resilience #bcresiliencecentre
#panningforgold #breastcancerawareness